From VTuber♂ to VTuber♀ - Chapter 79

**Even If It’s Not a Dream? (1)**

“I wanted to meet you.”

That’s what my twin—**Koyuki**—said.

Her voice was so soft, so faint, like she might disappear any second. On top of that, she was wearing an oxygen mask. By all accounts, I shouldn’t have been able to hear her clearly, but her voice somehow reached my ears with strange clarity.

What should I even say?

That I wanted to meet her too?

No, that didn’t feel right. Until now, I’d never really had any desire to meet my twin.

“I… not really.”

“I see.”

Her eyebrows drooped ever so slightly.

Anyone could see it—it was the face of someone who’d just been hurt.

My heart twisted with guilt, like I’d committed some terrible sin.

It wasn’t pain from my body being sick—it was a different kind.

But still… doesn’t the saying go, _you have to hear a Korean sentence to the end?_

“…But, I’m still glad I met you.”

“…Thank you.”

Maybe standing was too much for her. Koyuki sat down at the edge of the bed.

Compared to me, her condition was clearly worse. Her complexion was so pale it made me realize—I’d been lucky to be the one whose body had changed.

What if I had been born in that state instead?

No, wait.

What if **she** had been the one whose body changed instead of me…?

“It’s strange. I almost thought I was hallucinating before I died. Like a gift from Santa or something.”

“Christmas is over, though.”

“Pfft, that’s true. Christmas _is_ over.”

Same face, same voice, but somehow her face looked different.

Unlike me, who’d mostly lived alone, her expressions were more varied—more vivid.

I thought I’d become more expressive lately, but compared to Koyuki, I was still lacking.

Well, it made sense. If she was in a hospital like this, then she must have people who cared about her.

…Still, it’s good if even one of us ended up happy.

And I _was_ happy now, too.

“I’m really, really glad I got to see you like this.”

“…I’m sorry.”

I apologized sincerely as she spoke, sounding overwhelmed.

Honestly… I felt the same.

I just didn’t understand how this body, seeing a twin I’d never met before, could feel such joy. It threw me off.

I was simply… confused.

Didn’t know how to begin—what to say first.

“Oh, right. You go by _Natsu_, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Natsu, do you like games?”

“Yeah, I love them.”

“And it’s even better when you play with someone you like, right?”

“…Definitely.”

“See? We’re the same.”

Yeah. We really were the same.

Born and raised in different places, but we liked the same things.

If someone else said we weren’t twins, we’d still know. Just by being around each other, we’d know.

I laughed bitterly and shook my head.

I used to imagine myself saying some really harsh things to my twin if we ever met.

_Because of you, I ended up like this._

_Because of you, I had to live such a hard life._

But was that really Koyuki’s fault?

…No. Of course not.

“Are you… really sick?”

“…Yeah.”

“How sick?”

I asked even though I already had a vague idea. I wanted to hear it from Koyuki herself.

Because I learned something after meeting Toya—_you won’t know unless someone tells you._

In response, Koyuki turned her head away slightly.

A gesture like she didn’t want to meet my eyes—it was enough to show me just how bad things really were.

_Even the way she turns her head when she doesn’t want to answer… it’s exactly like me._

That was a habit I had before my body changed. I didn’t think it’d be so identical.

She didn’t say it out loud, but her body told me enough.

She didn’t want to worry me.

Even though she was the one with an oxygen mask strapped to her face.

“Sorry, Natsu. I’m starting to feel sleepy. I think I need to rest.”

“Oh, okay… sorry for waking you.”

“I actually woke up because I felt like I’d meet you—so really, thank you for waking me.”

Koyuki gave me a gentle smile and laid back down on the bed.

She must’ve been really exhausted, because she fell asleep almost immediately.

I quietly backed away.

I should head back too.

If Toya wakes up and I’m not there, she’ll worry herself sick. Yeah.

_See you again, Koyuki._

I only said it in my heart, but somehow it felt like Koyuki heard it.

Maybe that’s what it means to be twins.

—

When I woke up in the morning, my body felt strangely light.

Wait, am I already over my cold?

Maybe I’d just had a really good dream—my body felt better than I expected.

Actually, no. _That wasn’t a dream._

I blinked slowly, remembering the lingering warmth still in my hands.

“Yeoreum, are you okay?”

“…Yeah. I think I’m all better.”

“Really?! J-Just in case, I’ll go get the doctor!”

“There’s no need to—”

Too late, she’s gone.

Well, I guess it makes sense.

The first time I got sick after my body changed, it had been _much_ worse.

Just thinking about it gives me chills.

Toya must’ve remembered too, which is why she ran off so fast.

“…Koyuki. That’s what she said, right?”

Now that I’m better, the problem isn’t me anymore.

It’s Koyuki.

That look on her face—like she could vanish any second. How could I brush that off as just a dream?

My body felt light now, too.

With a little “hiya!” I jumped off the bed.

Landed safely on my slippers this time.

“Toya worries way too much…”

I picked up my phone from the table and started typing.

Let’s see… something like _I’m heading to the room at the end of the upstairs hallway_ should be enough, right?

I wasn’t sure if it was okay to barge into Koyuki’s room unannounced, but I had this weird feeling that _now_ was the time to go.

Somehow… I got the sense Koyuki might think everything that happened yesterday was a dream.

Just a hunch.

_Knock knock—_

“…Still sleeping?”

It _was_ early. Considering she fell asleep in the middle of the night, and her condition, it wasn’t likely she’d be up yet.

Should I just go back?

…No. No, this felt like one of those moments where she _wants_ to answer, but doesn’t have the strength.

Anyone else would probably say I was being ridiculous—but something about it felt right.

“Koyuki? Are you asleep?”

“…Ah.”

I gently opened the door and peeked inside, calling out softly.

There she was—same hair as mine, staring blankly at the ceiling.

Then she turned her head and _bam_, I saw it—her expression, completely stunned.

Yep. She thought it was a dream for real.

She looked around like she couldn’t believe what she was seeing, so I stepped inside.

I’d gotten used to these big slippers—hardly made any noise anymore.

“…So it wasn’t a dream.”

“You looked like you thought it was, so I came.”

“Pfft, what even is that?”

“Didn’t you wake up expecting to see me too?”

“Yeah. I did.”

We looked at each other and smiled the same smile.

I still didn’t like mirrors much—but seeing Koyuki didn’t bother me.

Maybe because we’re twins?

What is it about twins that makes you stop hating yourself just by seeing your other half?

…Or maybe it’s just because Koyuki wasn’t a mirror.

“I thought it was a sweet dream before dying. Minori told me she found someone who looked just like me.”

“…Minori?”

“Oh, she’s my guardian. You might’ve seen her in the hospital? If I had to describe her, she’s, uh—”

_Creak—_

“Oh. She looks like that.”

I turned to the door when I heard the hinge squeak—and there she was.

Ragu-sensei, staring at Koyuki and me with a _look_.

So then… Ragu-sensei is Koyuki’s guardian?

That explains everything.

Why the model I used looked just like me.

Why Ragu-sensei’s wisp art always had _two_ girls in it.

Why she gave me apples and oranges.

“Hello, Ragu-sensei.”

“…Hello, Ichinose-san.”

“…”

“…”

This is awkward.

She was staring at me like she was going to eat me alive, and I instinctively lowered my head.

U-uhm…

I wanted to say something, _anything_, but couldn’t find the words.

…She must be mad, right? Even if we’re twins, it’s not polite to sneak into a patient’s hospital room. Right. Yeah.

“Minori, stop glaring like that. You’re scaring Natsu.”

“Ah.”

“Honestly. You always get like this when it’s about me.”

“It’s okay. It _was_ my fault for just barging in…”

Koyuki scolded Ragu-sensei, and I quickly jumped in to defend her.

I just couldn’t stand there in silence after Koyuki said that—though to be honest, it was more like a reflex in response to her teasing tone.

Anyway, the awkward atmosphere quickly melted away as Ragu-sensei let out a quiet chuckle.