From VTuber♂ to VTuber♀ - Chapter 14

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January — I Just Want to Disappear.

After running for what felt like forever, I ended up at a playground near a residential area.

Why did I run away? Why was I even running?

Pushing down the whirlwind of thoughts in my head, I trudged over to the bench and slumped down. I’d been running so long that I was completely out of breath, coughing without even meaning to.

Ugh, my chest hurts. Just from a little coughing, I end up like this?

“…I hope she’s okay.”

The sky above looked just like my burnt-out heart—gray and gloomy. It felt like it could rain at any moment.

I stared blankly up at the sky, and then—splat. A drop hit me, and I blinked.

Rain in this weather…?

“—Wait, that’s not it.”

Drip. Drip, drip.

I lifted my arm and wiped away the tears—but the more I wiped, the more tears spilled down my face.

If I hadn’t ended up in this body, I wouldn’t have needed to get a part-time job. And if not for that, Grandma wouldn’t have had to stay up so late.

That thought made my mood even worse.

I raised the hand that had been wiping away my tears and smacked my other arm.

You stupid body. Stupid, worthless body.

“…Doesn’t even hurt. Ha.”

No matter how hard I hit this frail body, it didn’t hurt.

I thought I’d built up some muscle sweeping with the broom every day, but I guess it was all in my head.

I was probably fated to live like this forever—fragile and useless.

“Heh…”

A hollow laugh escaped me.

Everything I’d been holding onto had slipped through my fingers. What little I had left was like grains of sand, all swept away.

The one bond I’d finally managed to form—I’d ruined it. It was my fault.

All of it was my fault. Everything that happened—everything—was because of me—

“Ah.”

Snow.

I instinctively tilted my head up at the cold sensation landing on my nose.

Flakes of snow were falling, one by one, then all at once.

Half the sky turned white as the snow began covering the ground below.

If I kept standing here, I’d probably catch a cold. I heard the flu was going around lately, so I might get really sick…

But I didn’t care.

Right now, all I wanted was to be buried in the silent snowfall.

Quietly. Silently. With nothing left—just the whole world covered in white—

—I just wanted to disappear.

—

Meanwhile…

Whenever I imagined going abroad, I always pictured a scene where a local friend would greet me at the airport holding a sign with my name.

Of course, that “local friend” was Yeoreum.

I always wondered what Yeoreum’s face looked like. Was he short or tall? Slender or broad-shouldered? On the slim side or more filled out? Handsome or plain?

What if he turned out to be totally my type and I fell for him at first sight?

Silly daydreams, but I was so excited to come to Korea that I let myself indulge in them.

“Wow… so many people…”

Maybe because it was the New Year, the airport was packed.

I looked around just in case someone was holding a sign with my name—but, as expected, there was nothing.

Well, of course not~ Yeoreum said he wasn’t feeling well.

Still, I wasn’t disappointed.

Because I had made it to Korea.

I’d dug through all sorts of records and managed to find the address where I’d once sent Yeoreum some merch. Pure luck.

“But… where do I go now?”

Even in the age of the internet, navigating a place for the first time was tough.

In Japan, I still got flustered going to unfamiliar areas—so of course Korea would be even harder.

I was floundering in real time.

Still, I didn’t feel anxious.

I was here in Korea, and I had Yeoreum’s address.

I just had to get there. That thought alone filled my head.

“Let’s see… taxi stand… ah, there it is!”

Good thing I’d studied Korean so hard.

I smiled, thinking once again that meeting Yeoreum had been such a stroke of luck, and hurried toward the sign for the taxi queue.

Wait—can I really get to Yeoreum’s house by taxi from the airport?

I tilted my head uncertainly, but figured it’d work out somehow.

‘Was I too laid-back about this…? He’s probably still sick right now.’

“Miss, if you want a taxi, you need to get in line.”

“Ah! Sorry…”

I’d thought there were just a lot of people walking by—but turns out it was all one big line.

I stared blankly at the endless stream of people and finally shuffled my feet to the very end.

Where was the end of this thing… ugh…

Ah, there.

After walking a few minutes, I reached the back of the line and let out a small sigh.

At this rate, I might waste all my time just waiting for a taxi.

“…Should I look into taking the subway?”

But then I remembered I’d need a taxi to get to the subway anyway.

So what’s the point?

The cold wind stung my hands, so I stuffed them deep into my coat pockets.

Let’s not rush. I’m overseas—why not enjoy the sights and the people a little?

“Brr, Korea’s so cold.”

Japan hadn’t been this chilly.

I never imagined that crossing just one sea would bring this much difference.

If my manager hadn’t packed a thick coat for me, I might’ve frozen to death waiting for a taxi and become a global meme: “Japanese Girl Dies at Airport.”

“Oh, I should make a post that I’ve arrived.”

I’d suddenly announced a hiatus, then canceled it, then canceled the cancellation… I figured I should post something on SNS to reassure my fans.

Hmm, maybe something like “Yatogami Toya has landed in Korea!” as the opening line?

Perfect.

—

[Fan Chat Thread]

[So… any updates on what’s going on with the streamer?]

[Still no replies from support, no social posts, no updates on their health—nothing.]

ㄴ[At this point, they seriously might’ve crashed and burned.]

ㄴ[Maybe they’re in a coma or something…]

ㄴ[What? Are you saying Yeoreum got pregnant from Toya’s massive dong and then got in a car crash and fell into a coma?]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme)]

ㄴ[You people are nuts LOL]

ㄴ[Streamer… even if you come back playing boomer games with dentures in, I won’t complain. Just come back…]

ㄴ[The Korean VTuber scene is dead…]

ㄴ[Check out the new debuts. Looks like a solid project from a big company.]

ㄴ[But they’re all girls.]

ㄴ[ㄴLOL]

ㄴ[ㄴLOLOLOL]

ㄴ[You’re all gay…]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme again)]

ㄴ[Why are you guys using the “corpse” meme? LOL]

ㄴ[Streamer’s not dead yet…]

[Toya has arrived in Korea.]

[(Screenshot of SNS Post: “Yatogami Toya has landed in Korea!”)]

[The fiery land of Joseon proudly welcomes Japan’s top VTuber, Yatogami Toya, to Korea!]

ㄴ[Get out of here.]

ㄴ[But Toya breathing Korean air? Can’t stand it…]

ㄴ[Revolution when?]

ㄴ[Toya being in Korea obviously means he came to see Yeoreum.]

ㄴ[What other reason could he possibly have for coming at this time? LOL]

ㄴ[Maybe it’s a venue check for a live concert?]

ㄴ[Yeah, he did mention in last year’s announcement that he wanted to do a Korean live this year.]

ㄴ[Still… it’s gotta be about Yeoreum.]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme again)]

ㄴ[Actually, Yeoreum is a cute middle school girl. It’s recorded in the Watermelon Wiki.]

ㄴ[Where did this whole “Yeoreum is a girl” thing even start?]

ㄴ[He once did a stream using a voice changer for April Fools.]

ㄴ[For real? LOL]

ㄴ[It was weirdly hot hearing him insist he’s a guy in a girly voice.]

ㄴ[I’m gonna go Natsushiko.]

ㄴ[Bro what the hell LOL]

[Yeoreum, I miss you…]

[The way your girlish voice squeals “kyaa~” is so lewd. But then you go and ghost me after lighting a fire in my heart, You… I waited a year for you, and now you vanish like that? Tsk, tsk, tsk. I even trained my Kegels to show off for the guy who thought he was a man. Yeoreum! I just want to hold you tight in my arms!!!!]

ㄴ[Sir, please…]

ㄴ[Is this a meme template?]

ㄴ[What kind of pamphlet is this?]

ㄴ[Template lore???]

ㄴ[This freak really uses the Korean VTuber forum…]

ㄴ[Yeoreum should’ve never done that TS (gender swap) concept stream before dying…]

ㄴ[But you were turned on, huh?]

ㄴ[So you really love Yeoreum that much? LOL]

ㄴ[Yeoreum, I miss you so damn much!!!]

ㄴ[Please come get your friend.]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme)]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme)]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum Canon Wife Meme)]

ㄴ[(Yeoreum “I’m Pretty” Meme)]

ㄴ[What the heck is that one LOL]

—

Let me know if you’d like a cleaned-up or summarized version too!