The Escort Knight Who Is Obsessed by the Villainess Wants to Escape - Chapter 121

“Do you think Judas is doing well?”

Lindel murmured blankly, gazing at the sky.

Nils, beside him, responded.

“He’s got skills. He wouldn’t struggle wherever he went.”

“True…”

Hador grumbled.

“Skills aren’t the problem. It’s his personality. I bet he’s gotten into some kind of trouble.”

“Bethany is just the kind of place for that to happen.”

“That’s why it would’ve been better for him to stay here, where he wouldn’t stand out so much…”

Regret changes nothing.

Judas isn’t coming back.

As Richard had said, everyone around them, except the two involved, had vaguely noticed their relationship and feelings.

They just pretended not to see, because the two were so desperately cautious.

No one knows exactly what passed between them.

Still, Judas was expelled.

Coming back after something like that wouldn’t be easy.

It’s nearly impossible.

Dylan tried to lighten the heavy mood.

“Judas will do well no matter where he is or what he does. We just need to focus on our tasks.”

Richard rested his chin in his hand and half-heartedly listened.

“More importantly, Lindel, Dyke. Is what you saw outside true?”

“Oh, yeah. Beyond that ridge, it looks like the Imperial Alliance is setting up camp.”

“Moving troops without even declaring war… It’s practically a declaration of war.”

“I’m not sure. We just patrolled the area and returned. Why hasn’t the lady reacted to this?”

“Well…”

They knew the reason, but it wasn’t an easy topic to voice.

Worrying about defeat didn’t cross their minds.

Eliza’s overwhelming power was far from failure.

Grand Duke Barak’s personal magical might was also formidable—enough to secure his current position.

But Eliza’s power was said to far surpass even that of the duke.

Though her strength had never been openly displayed, making precise estimation difficult.

The chances of defeat were slim.

Assuming Eliza was in her right mind.

“What are we going to do…”

Leaving wasn’t an option.

Breaking their sworn loyalty was unthinkable.

Especially since Judas had asked them to handle his share too.

“Sigh.”

As someone sighed in frustration, a messenger hurriedly ran through the mansion’s main gate.

This had become a common sight lately.

News, either from allied forces or hostile factions, always arriving in haste.

The panting messenger approached Dylan.

“The lady… Where is she?”

“Maybe… in Judas’s old bedroom again. Is this something she needs to hear directly?”

“Well, not necessarily, but…”

Hesitating, the messenger delivered the news.

As soon as the words left his mouth, the entire guard stood up abruptly, focusing on him as if to confirm what they’d just heard.

Eliza stirred restlessly in bed.

Her tangled hair remained unkempt.

Staggering, she went to the window and watered the potted plant.

Once a week.

Never miss it.

The anemone might die otherwise.

After confirming the soil was moist, she returned to bed.

Hugging a doll, she gazed vacantly at the plant.

Sunlight poured over the pot.

Though her eyes looked outward, her mind sank deeper within.

A space where outside sensations could not intrude.

She crouched in the cage, staring at the anemone.

When she inhaled deeply, a peculiar floral scent lingered.

It wasn’t the anemone—it was Judas’s scent.

The last trace left on the bed.

Even that was faint.

With time, his scent would vanish completely.

The sudden fear of losing it made her inhale so deeply it felt like her lungs might burst, exhaling it all at once.

“Kehuk, kuhuk….”

Coughing harshly, interrupting the flow of words.

Her throat stung from vomiting several times a day.

These days, even breathing felt like a burden.

Beyond burdensome—tiresome.

Why must one breathe? She didn’t know.

It had been a long time since she last cried.

At some point, even tears stopped coming.

She simply waited, endlessly.

Even though she knew he wouldn’t come.

Even though she ensured he wouldn’t.

Such a nauseating duality.

She cast him out, demanding he never return, yet hoped for his return.

Even after stabbing him with sharp, cutting words, she wished he would embrace her forgivingly.

If only.

If such a miraculous thing occurred, then she would let go of everything and apologize.

She would fall to him like petals from a helplessly withering flower.

Eyes wide open, she dreamed.

Like catching scattered petals, he embraced the version of herself tossed into emptiness.

A beautiful, rapturous illusion.

That dream was a nightmare.

Because it was a dream that could never come true.

How long had it been since she cried? Since she laughed?

Then, suddenly, Yuel came to mind.

The moon deer Judas had brought.

The memory of herself as a child, pressing her forehead to the deer’s and laughing purely.

What expression had Judas worn back then?

She thought he had stared blankly at her.

What had you thought of me then, as you looked at me?

In hindsight, she realized she had been relying on him ever since.

After a long time, Eliza decided to visit the stable.

Though she didn’t want to use magic, just this once, she had to teleport.

If she walked, Lia would worry and follow her.

She didn’t want anyone by her side.

Unless it was Judas.

Using magic would stoke the fire within her, but it seemed manageable.

Since Judas left, the fire had continued to burn, but it no longer felt hot.

Rather, it was as cold as ash.

A detestable power.

It had harmed her mother and ultimately driven Judas away.

At the same time, it was essential to defeat Bevel.

When she teleported, she arrived at the stable in an instant.

She was barefoot, but it didn’t matter.

Lia would panic and search for her once she noticed her absence, but she didn’t care.

Yuel, curled on the ground and asleep, perked up her ears and opened her eyes.

Recognizing Eliza, she got up, though her steps were weaker than usual.

Even her clear eyes seemed to lack energy.

Watching her approach, Eliza saw a young Judas superimposed over her.

The first time he had brought the moon deer.

The dazed look on his face when she said she’d save it.

Since then, they often stroked the moon deer together in this stable.

It was a time of rest and solace in a life otherwise devoid of leisure.

A time she had destroyed.

In the name of reprioritization, she had pushed him aside.

She shouldn’t have.

She hadn’t realized it while he was there.

He was hers.

That fact had felt so natural it was taken for granted.

He was the only given in her life, so much so that he was essentially herself.

She hadn’t seen it.

Human eyes face outward; they cannot see themselves.

That’s why she had forgotten him, the part of herself reflected in him.

Only after pushing him away did she face the truth.

Only after he was separated as an ‘other’ could she recognize him.

He was another version of herself and the foundation that supported her existence.

“Ah….”

If he stayed by her side, she couldn’t destroy the Babel family.

And yet, even with him gone, she still couldn’t.

When she cast him out, she felt the pain of ripping her own flesh.

It wasn’t a delusion.

Judas was, in essence, Eliza herself.

Without him, she wasn’t truly herself.

And he wouldn’t return—he mustn’t.

If he stayed by her side, he would burn and perish.

In a state of paralyzing indecision, all she could confront was her own infinite helplessness.

The ground beneath her feet felt like it was crumbling, and Eliza collapsed helplessly.

She fell to her knees and slumped onto the ground.

“Ah… ugh… ngh…”

It felt as if a hole had opened in the middle of her chest.

The pitch-black void ached so much that she clenched her teeth.

Tears flowed uncontrollably from her bloodshot eyes, despite her will.

Even crying felt indulgent, so she clenched her fists tightly in an effort to suppress it.

Her fingertips stung as they scraped against the dirt.

“Ugh…! Ngh! Aaaah!”

In the end, she couldn’t hold it back and let out a scream mixed with sobs.

She pounded the ground with her small fists.

It was too late for regret.

Even though she knew regret wouldn’t change anything, the overwhelming emotions coursing through her couldn’t be stopped.

As she furiously struck the ground, berating herself with cruel words in her mind, Yuel approached and pressed his forehead against hers.

“Ah…”

Eliza blankly raised her head.

Through her tear-streaked face, she looked at Yuel.

The moon deer with gentle eyes rubbed its forehead across her face as if to comfort her.

It shared its warmth.

“Hic…! Sniff…”

Her trembling lips bit down, and then she suddenly wrapped her arms around the deer’s neck.

“Ugh… Aaaah—!”

Holding onto its warmth, she cried like a child.

The moon deer calmly sat down and offered its embrace.

Eliza only felt more sorrow.

It was all her fault.

Her poor judgment had ruined everything.

Yet no one blamed her.

If only they had scolded her, her heart might have felt lighter.

But since they didn’t, she could only heap blame on herself.

“Ahhh—! Hic, sniff…”

Even as her sobs racked her body, Yuel stayed by her side.

Then, someone suddenly flung open the door and rushed in.

“My lady—!”

It was Lia.

She ran in pale-faced and threw her arms around the weeping Eliza.

“Lia… What… what should I do…?”

Murmuring in a dazed voice, Eliza could only cling to her, her voice childlike and pleading.

Lia had no choice but to hug her even tighter.

Even after years of being together, Eliza had never shown her true self like this.

It meant she had truly reached her breaking point.

“Now… now what should I do… I…”

Lia bit her lip hard to hold back her tears.

She couldn’t cry, too.

She could only hold the trembling Eliza close.

The world was unbearably cruel.

‘What did this child ever do wrong… How much more must she endure…?’

She had come urgently with news to deliver.

But she couldn’t bring herself to say it.

A commotion stirred outside the stables.

Eliza looked over Lia’s shoulder at the gathering crowd.

Every face bore a somber expression.

Eliza instinctively felt a wave of fear.

Something, something she didn’t want to know, was coming.

When had the rain outside begun to fall?

“…My lady.”

Captain Dylan of the royal guard took a step into the stable.

Eliza wanted to run but couldn’t.

She could only cling to Lia even tighter.

“An important message has arrived.”

I don’t want to hear it.

I want to pretend I don’t know.

I just want to stay like this, oblivious to everything…

Eliza raised her hands to cover her ears but slowly let them fall.

She averted her gaze, exhaling as if sighing.

She couldn’t believe Dylan’s next words, spoken reluctantly.

“Judas is dead.”