The Escort Knight Who Is Obsessed by the Villainess Wants to Escape - Chapter 117

An indefinite deployment to the Grave of Knights.

Why Eliza suddenly made such a decision.

Why she choked me that day.

I still don’t know anything.

So.

“Miss, let’s talk.”

I need to find out.

Eliza didn’t answer my question right away.

She just stared at me silently.

It’s a technique she often uses to pressure others.

The silence of authority.

She’d never used it on me before.

I met her gaze directly, refusing to avoid it.

“Hah.”

Eventually, she sighed as if annoyed and gestured to Lia.

To leave the room.

Lia quietly exited the office.

Only after the door closed did Eliza speak.

“What do you want to talk about?”

Her returning voice was as cold as ice.

“This order. What does it mean?”

“Exactly what it says. You can read, can’t you?”

“…Miss. Do you really think I came here because I couldn’t read this?”

“Can’t think of any other reason.”

The Grave of Knights.

The destination is Bethany.

Being deployed there is a punishment for one’s sins, and an indefinite deployment is as good as a death sentence.

Of course, few follow the order to the letter.

Most try to escape midway.

This splits into two cases.

One: the master forces the person to Bethany, using physical power.

This means wishing for a complete and miserable death.

And two: they give the deployment order but leave it alone, letting them go or not.

This means they don’t care whether the person lives or dies.

I fall into the latter case.

“Have I done something wrong?”

“No.”

“Then what is it you want from me?”

“Judas, be clear about what you’re asking. What do you want to hear?”

“……”

The question rising to the tip of my tongue is temporarily held back.

It’s not the time to bring it up.

Eliza’s right.

I need to be clear about what I want.

“Do you want me to die?”

“……”

“Am I no longer needed?”

“Hm.”

Eliza tapped the table a few times.

Propping her chin with her hand, she looked out the window with a disinterested expression, then answered.

“Yes.”

“……”

“Does that answer your question?”

“…No. I find it hard to understand. It doesn’t make sense logically. Aren’t we in a situation where we need every soldier we can get?”

“That’s true.”

“Then why are you expelling me in this situation?”

Eliza closed her eyes softly and leaned back in her chair.

Then she slowly opened them, staring at the ceiling.

To me, her reaction seemed nothing but one of indifference.

She slowly looked at me again and spoke.

“Judas. Do you know about the First Scripture?”

“…?”

“There’s a passage in it. It says, ‘The distorted sun, in pursuit of its perfection, will long for the moon and eventually devour it.’”

It’s a bit different from what I heard five years ago from Aquinas, but roughly similar.

“You might not know, but all this time, I’ve been absorbing your power while staying by your side. That magic, akin to the moon.”

“……”

“And the maddening fire within me constantly tests my violence. But with your power, I could subdue and control it.”

“Then, on the contrary, I…”

“But now, I don’t need you anymore.”

Eliza spoke nonchalantly.

Her gaze was entirely fixed out the window.

Her attitude suggested that even taking the time to explain this was too much trouble.

“I already have enough power on my own. I don’t need cumbersome forces. Honestly, that’s not what’s important. Like I said, when you’re around, my violent tendencies subside. In other words—”

Her crimson eyes turned to me, looking at me with indifference.

In contrast, her voice was cold and sharp, as if severing a connection.

“Your existence hinders me.”

“…….”

“When you’re around, I calm down. And that’s not acceptable. In a position where war must be waged, I can’t allow my violent nature to be suppressed.”

Eliza shrugged her shoulders.

“That’s the reason. I’m simply eliminating an annoying weakness. It’s not just that I don’t need you; you’re a burden.”

“So… were you trying to strangle me?”

“…Ah. I didn’t realize you were awake. At the time, it was unintentional. But thinking it over, it seemed like the wrong approach.”

Eliza looked at me and smiled.

It wasn’t a kind smile, but a chilling, malicious grin that gave away nothing of her true feelings.

Long ago, I thought that was the most fitting and familiar expression for Eliza.

Now, that eerie smile seemed alien as she gazed up at me.

With the face of the villainess I had once irrationally feared in the past.

“You’ve worked hard all this time, so I’ll at least grant you some dignity. This deployment order is my way of showing that consideration.”

“…….”

“Do you understand now?”

“Not yet. Is it because my magic has weakened?”

“Hm.”

Eliza’s calm eyes scanned me up and down, then she shrugged.

“Not particularly. I told you, your very existence is an obstacle for me. Whether you’ve weakened or not is irrelevant to me.”

“Then why provide me with ingredients that enhance magic…?”

“You were once my knight, after all. If you went to Bethany and died too easily, it would tarnish my reputation. That’s all there is to it.”

“…….”

I clutched my throbbing forehead.

“What about what you showed me at the Founding Festival…?”

Eliza cut me off with a sigh.

“I was just using you. Back then, I hadn’t yet fully absorbed your strength. Anyway, our relationship was always just a contract, wasn’t it?”

“…I see.”

“Whether you head to the deployment zone or run away midway, I won’t interfere. But if possible, I’d prefer you die. It would be troublesome if I started needing your calming influence during the war.”

“…….”

I exhaled deeply.

Should I ask, or should I not?

It was a question I had hesitated over for a very long time.

Even now, I wavered.

But if not now, I might never find out.

So I decided to speak.

“…I thought you liked me.”

My voice trembled slightly.

I felt wretched.

It was pitiful, childish even.

Like a tantrum from a child.

Yet, as I was leaving, I couldn’t just ignore it entirely.

Pathetically, even in this situation, I was still concerned about her.

Sardis.

I worried my question might remind her of that childhood trauma.

Her crying face, her trembling body, and everything that happened afterward—

It was all vivid to me, as if it happened yesterday.

But my concern was an emotion of little value.

Eliza’s lips twitched.

The expression she made next—

The reaction to my question—was a sneer.

She laughed, lifting only one corner of her mouth.

“I told you. I was just trying to use you. I set things up so you’d misunderstand and get the wrong idea. I learned that men are easy to manipulate that way.”

“…….”

I thought there might have been a misunderstanding.

That there was some reason she couldn’t express.

I was clumsy too, so I thought perhaps I’d made a mistake.

I believed we could resolve it through conversation.

But I was wrong.

The conclusion unraveled at the end of the conversation wasn’t what I had expected.

Logic and emotion.

I couldn’t persuade Eliza in any way, nor could I step into her heart.

But I… truly, about you…

“I…”

A hollow laugh escaped me as I tried to speak.

What was I even trying to do now that it was all over?

I let out a bitter smile and ran a hand over my face.

Eliza simply looked up at me with emotionless red eyes.

So unwavering—what meaning could my words possibly have?

“Until now.”

I removed the ornament fixed to my shirt collar.

A small, sparkling red jewel, just like her eyes.

The symbol of a knight’s escort.

I placed it on her desk.

“To have served you…”

I removed the necklace.

An artifact that allowed us to connect whenever needed.

I no longer had any reason to keep it.

I set the necklace down.

“It was an honor.”

Finally, I bowed deeply in respect.

She watched me with those same indifferent eyes, then gestured for me to leave with a tilt of her chin.

I obeyed the order without resistance.

There was no choice.

In a time where I sought to escape tragedy by avoiding choices, I ended up with an entirely unexpected ending.

The absurdity of this reality made me laugh.

For all the years I’d wanted to flee, I was now being cast out by her.

***

Clunk.

The door softly closed as Judas carefully stepped out.

Eliza gazed at the door with an impassive look.

His footsteps grew distant.

Hearing them fade, Eliza bit her lip tightly.

The smooth mask shattered in an instant.

She covered her face with both hands, forcing her breath to remain steady.

Tears welled up, dampening her palms.

‘Hold it in… hold it… you have to… you did well. Judas didn’t notice; you did well…’

Wearing a mask was easy.

She had worn it for so long that she could no longer distinguish between her bare face and the mask.

Or so she thought.

But before Judas, she had worn her mask for far too long.

So long she couldn’t even remember when it had first been put on.

She had nearly revealed her true face many times.

Each time, Eliza avoided his gaze, closed her eyes, or sighed to escape the moment.

She worked tirelessly to ensure her mask wouldn’t break before him.

The result?

Success.

Impeccable success, even though the word ‘success’ felt utterly ill-fitting.

She had no choice.

She anticipated every question he might ask, prepared every answer in advance.

She had rehearsed over and over for today.

Judas had said everything she predicted.

Even the questions she wished wouldn’t surface—Judas, ever transparent and sincere, held nothing back.

Unlike her.

‘…I thought you liked me.’

She had prepared a response to that too.

But she wasn’t confident she could answer it without faltering.

What if he really asked?

She worried endlessly.

Her lips trembled, but she barely turned the surge of emotions into a sneering smile.

Her voice didn’t waver, and she delivered the lie she had prepared flawlessly.

The truth—that her feelings matched his—remained hidden.

She was relieved he hadn’t opened his eyes when she was on top of him.

She truly hadn’t known he was awake.

If she had seen his eyes burning with confusion and distress, he might have doubted her reactions today.

It was truly fortunate.

Though she wasn’t sure if calling it “fortunate” made any sense.

‘No, this is good… this is how it should be…’

She understood Judas’s feelings.

She hadn’t before, but now she couldn’t help but know.

Once she became aware of her own emotions, his feelings became just as evident, like ripe fruit hanging heavy on a branch.

It wasn’t just about what happened during the Founding Festival.

Five years of emotions they had built together—there was no way she wouldn’t know.

How deeply they had intertwined with each other.

Which was precisely why she had to sever it so harshly.

While seeming to have a filthy temper, the foolishly kind Judas had no choice but to do this.

Even the truth that he might die had to be hidden.

Because of his nature, even if it meant dying, he would try to stay by her side.

When she lashed out with cruel words, her heart was torn apart as well.

Before they knew it, they had become each other’s second name.

Even so, she had to do it.

It was almost like a duty.

Having him near her would put Judas in danger.

It wasn’t just the harm from the war.

She might end up killing him herself.

Eliza had confirmed this disgusting nature of hers and had accepted it with bitter despair.

When the war broke out, she knew she would undoubtedly use grand and excessive magic.

In an attempt to escape that mad fire, she would seek Judas.

And again, she would hurt him.

If she absorbed his power until it was completely drained, he might die.

She would be the one to kill him.

Hiding him in a cage at the base of a mountain would be meaningless.

Eliza knew.

She could not restrain herself when it came to him.

As long as she knew his location, she would impulsively seek him out sooner or later.

The likelihood of that was extremely high.

So sending him far away, somewhere she didn’t know, was the best option for both of them.

Because she had become a disaster-like threat to him.

‘Don’t weaken… don’t weaken…’

She repeated those words to steel herself.

He probably wouldn’t go to Bethany.

He would drop off somewhere along the way.

She hoped so.

She wished he could live somewhere, anywhere she didn’t know.

Her words wishing for his death were all lies.

A truth Judas must never know.

‘…Don’t let yourself weaken.’

Her top priority was to destroy the Bevel family.

There was no reason for Judas to sacrifice himself for that.

“Hoo…”

With a sigh, she opened her eyes.

In her view were a pair of red cuffs and a golden necklace.

The things Judas had left behind.

“……”

Overwhelmed by a sudden surge of tears, she tightly shut her eyes.

She sprang to her feet and moved to the window.

Down below.

She could see Judas’s back as he prepared to leave.

He was bidding farewell to the guards.

‘This is it now… Destroying the Bevel family is my everything… It’s done.’

He grew distant.

Five years. That was the time she had spent with him.

Looking back, those years shone vibrantly, like a colorful mosaic.

As much as her childhood with her mother had.

Those fleetingly fast five years, the memories, the emotions she had come to realize—all of them grew distant.

It felt as though a stake had been driven through her heart.

It hurt, and yet it didn’t.

The space it left was hollow.

She had already sent away everything in her life once, and now she was sending it away a second time.

Even so, she could not collapse.

She couldn’t afford to weaken.

Clinging to those words as if they were an obsession, she barely managed to hold herself together.

Hermes blocked his path as he was about to leave.

It seemed they were exchanging goodbyes.

Eliza widened her eyes, then abruptly drew the curtains.

Her jaw trembled as she bit her lips hard.

She gripped the windowsill with a shaking hand.

“Kkueuk… Hhrrrk…!”

In the end, she couldn’t suppress the storm of emotions.

With a window separating them from view, Eliza cried for a long time.

Unaware that Judas was gazing up at her window from beyond the curtain.